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But I will say this ... the ones that do? Oh boy!But this story is about me and Rachel.It was this Thanksgiving. All this ultimately unproductive and unsatisfying dating was making me nuts. Serious partner hunting is a job. An expensive job and you don't get nearly as much trim as married people think. Anyway, I'd given up women for the holidays, as I needed a break and didn't have plans for Thanksgiving, so I invited Ardis to brunch at a fancy restaurant in the Glendale mountains and:"Oh, by the way, why don't you bring along your daughter, what's-her-name?" (Please?)The day started off uneventfully, except Ardis complained that I wasn't paying enough attention to her and the waiter thought Rachel and I were the couple and that Ardis was the third wheel. Interesting, because there was very little actual conversation between Rachel and me, as I was having trouble speaking. No, not too many mimosas; too much Rachel. I couldn't concentrate. I couldn't take my eyes off her. Being around. “Being good little FBI agents, we moved in and eliminated the entire group. We burned their bodies in one of the abandoned houses. We decided to spend an extra two days there justifying it as a means of assuring that we hadn’t missed anyone. Each of us claimed a house so that we could pretend to be a high government official. It was actually a kind of joke among us.“I picked out a house that looked to be in exceptional shape. Almost all of the windows were intact. The doors were closed and the roof was in one piece. As I discovered when I came here, the house was a rarity in that had a metal roof and that had protected the interior better than the shingles that are much more common.“I went inside the house and started to explore all of the rooms. It was the fourth or fifth room when I made my great discovery. The room contained a library of books and magazines that were in amazing condition. All of the material dated back more than thirty years and some of it was sixty years old.“I.
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